42 Ways to Krieg up your Life
  • February 8th, 2010 | tr00 metal life

    heavy-metal-inspiration

    As promised, here are 42 ways to add some tr00, kvlt, krieg, grymm, evil metalness to your life:

    1. Air guitar on the train
    2. Make your own bullet belt 
    3. Alphabetize your CD / Vinyl collection. Mine is alphabetized by the second letter of the artists name, because I’m special.
    4. Organise your CD / Vinyl collection by sub-genre.
    5. Tattoo album art onto your body
    6. Draw tomato sauce pentagrams on top of pizza
    7. Drive a tank
    8. Go hunting
    9. Go hunting with bow and arrow
    10. Learn an instrument
    11. Attend Wacken
    12. Drink from a horn
    13. Be constantly broke
    14. Yell “Play some Slayeeeeeer” at concerts. Every concert. Yes, even the Symphony. 
    15. write in runes
    16. death growl your wedding vows
    17. sign your name in virgin’s blood
    18. quote Nietzche at inappropriate moments
    19. quote Manowar during sex
    20. add a metal umlaut to your name
    21. plan the playlist for your funeral.
    22. Name your health insurance policy “Metal Health”
    23. Own a sword
    24. live the maxin ‘combat boots go with everything”.
    25. Cover all your clothing with patches …
    26. … including your underwear
    27. Buy a copy of Dawn of Black Hearts with Dead’s dead body on the cover for a ridiculously inflated price.
    28. Name your children after Cannibal Corpse songs
    29. Name your cat after a demon of hell
    30. chop your wood with a battleaxe
    31. Work the words tr00, kvlt, krieg, grymm, evil and nekro into your daily vocabulary
    32. headbang during sex
    33. design your own illegible “black metal” signature to sign important documents with
    34. save your ticket stubs in a photo album, alongside guitar picks and drumstick remnants tossed from the metal gods.
    35. put your old underground black metal bootlegged cassette tapes on ebay for $500 apiece.
    36. Spend the proceeds on beer. 
    37. eat steak at every meal
    38. silence is golden, but blastbeats are better.
    39. have a side project
    40. use \m/ in all email correspondence
    41. read this, and giggle.
    42. Be yourself and to hell with what everyone else thinks.

    Feel free to add more ideas.

    Horns up \m/
    Steff

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6 Responses and Counting...

  • [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Daniel Goldwater, Steff Green. Steff Green said: New ramblings!42 Ways to Kreig up your Life – http://tinyurl.com/yh6owpx [...]

  • What do you mean with kreig? Do you by any chance mean the German word krieg? That’s spelled differently ;) Sorry for being a German nitpicker, but kreig is just not krieg ;)

    Fun list though!

  • Tausend Dank! Adastra, feel free to nitpick away – I miss things when I type so much, and neither “krieg” nor “kreig” are in my computer dictionary. Rest assured, I’ll never spell it “kreig” again \m/

  • Laffed many times at your list. Then laffed more times when I followed your link at No. 41. But now I am upset with myself, because laffing isn’t krieg, is it? Am trying to compensate for laffter by browsing demon names for cat. He’s 17 years old but probably won’t notice when we start calling him something other than “kitty.”

  • If you work at an office make sure your mug looks like a tankard, or IS a tankard. (My mug is actually a cute white one with bears my mum gave me – I use it for the double purpose of demonstrating my love for her and messing with my workmates’ heads a bit)

    Awesome blog \m/

  • Gronk hails in accordance with the prophecy!

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